


It's a Wonderful Life, David Rose

by Stargatewars



Series: A Schitt Year [51]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, It's an Wonderful Life AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-30
Updated: 2019-12-30
Packaged: 2021-02-25 08:01:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22032691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stargatewars/pseuds/Stargatewars
Summary: It's a Wonderful Life AUDavid wishes that he was never born. His wish in granted but the outcome isn't what he expected.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Series: A Schitt Year [51]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1253942
Comments: 23
Kudos: 176





	It's a Wonderful Life, David Rose

**Author's Note:**

> What a year! I can’t believe we’ve reached the end!  
> I just wanted to say a massive thank you to my amazing friend and beta @fanfic_or_bust! Kelly, I honestly couldn’t have done this without your constant support.  
> Thank you to everyone that provided a prompt or left comments and kudos. They were all great appreciated.  
> This has been a really fun experience and I am looking forward to what comes next!

David’s day couldn’t possibly have been worse. As he sat staring into his drink, perched on an ironically wobbly stool at the Wobbly Elm, he thought about his day. His week. His life.

It was New Years Eve and his life was falling apart. He had disappointed everyone he cared about in the weeks leading up to Christmas and it had all come to a head an hour before.

A week prior, David and Patrick were informed that Rose Apothecary was being audited. David knew it wasn’t because of Patrick. David had been the one that had forgotten to mail the check for three weeks. He was the one who had lost three days worth of receipts. He was the one that hated balancing the books and always left it up to Patrick.

Patrick had told him it was fine, that he would work it out, but David had seen how little his husband had been sleeping, the bags under his eyes, the way he rubbed the back of his neck as he reviewed the paperwork they were required to submit.

He saw how Patrick had spun his wedding ring around and around on his finger. It was exactly what David did when he was stressed.

Regrets. That’s what he must be experiencing now, David thought to himself as he had watched Patrick thumb through another report.

His parents had been pressuring David about the Christmas and New Years Eve party. Johnny had wanted David to donate decorations and wine from the store for their annual Christmas Eve party. Moira had wanted to reprise ‘The Number’. David had given them both a resounding ‘No’ on both counts. They had both lectured him and called him ungrateful. Despite Christmas having passed, his parents had still bought it up that morning. Part of him knew that they were dealing with their own stresses, Johnny was busy with the second motel and Moira was in negotiations for a part in a film. But he couldn’t bring himself to do what they asked.

Two days before Christmas, Alexis had asked David to drive her to Elm Falls to meet with a potential client. He’d agreed, then slept through his alarm, Patrick already having left for the day. Alexis had lost the client and blamed David. He knew he should have made more of an effort, asked Patrick to force him out of bed before leaving, instead he had rolled over when Patrick had kissed him goodbye and fallen back to sleep. The client had been a major loss for Alexis, she had looked at David with such disappointment.

Days of disappointment, of letting his family down had culminated and overwhelmed him as he and Patrick had prepared for the New Years Eve party. It would be the first New Years party they hosted. The year prior David and Patrick had rung in the new year surrounded by boxes in their new home.They had wanted to host the party, to show how far they had come in a year, to celebrate their growth and the growth of the whole Rose family.

As Patrick was unloading the wine from the back of the car, his phone rang. Patrick had pushed the box into David’s hands and quickly answered it, in case it was the auditors. As David walked up the front steps he slipped on the ice, sending the case of wine flying and shattering onto the ground.

His family, who had arrived early under the pretence of helping to set up, but were mainly waiting to start drinking early all walked out the front and looked at David as wine dripped down the steps.

‘Oh my god David,’ Alexis said, looking at the shattered glass on the ground.

‘Wow David. Way to ruin the party,’ Stevie said, holding her empty wine glass disappointingly.

Patrick was on the phone but watched David, a disappointed look on his already exhausted features.

‘I can’t do this,’ David said covering his face with his hands, ‘I shouldn’t be here.’

‘Really David, now we have to move the party. We can’t have guests walking over broken glass,’ Johnny looked at the smashed bottles but made no effort to start cleaning.

It was just the final straw in a week of bad luck. David felt overwhelmed, felt like a failure and a burden.

He let the anxiety running through him win and he turned and ran. He jumped into Patrick’s car, thankful that the keys were in the ignition and sped away, not looking back as his family called after him.

Unlike the last time that David had taken a car without asking, he didn’t attempt to leave town. He knew now that there was nothing for him beyond the limits of Schitt’s Creek. His entire life was in that town. Everyone he loved. Everyone he cared about. Everyone he had let down.

He stopped at the Wobbly Elm, unsure where else he could go. It had been a while since he had gone there, the last time was as a wingman for Stevie, but nothing had changed. If anything it was even sadder on New Years Eve.

He ordered a whiskey, wanting something that burned his throat, that made him wince.

David felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He pulled it out to see Patrick’s smiling face looking at him from the screen.

‘You’d be better off without me,’ David muttered, thrusting the phone back in his pocket unanswered.

He thought about how much better Patrick’s life would be without him. If he had a partner that understood business, that remembered to file paperwork on time, that wanted to do things like inventory. Patrick’s life could be so different. Could be so much better without him.

David thought about the rest of his family. Without him there would be no broken wine, no ruined party. Alexis would have made her appointment and secured the client. His parents would have had a Christmas party without worrying about David ruining it. Stevie could have a friend that was there for her when she needed it, no complaints.

All of their lives would be better without David Rose in it, he decided.

‘I wish I’d never been born,’ he muttered into his drink.

‘Excuse me?’ a man said next to him. David hadn’t noticed him before. It was almost as if he had appeared from nowhere.

‘Nothing,’ David looked back at his drink, not wanting to talk to a stranger. Not wanting to talk to anyone. He wanted to be left alone in his misery.

‘You just said,’ the man shifted closer, ‘that you wished you hadn’t been born.’

‘And?’ David looked at the man properly for the first time. He was older, maybe in his sixties, with short grey hair brushed neatly to the side. His clothes looked old, dated but tidy, a blue spotted bow tie, sat around his neck.

‘You shouldn’t wish for things like that,’ the man continued, ‘if it hadn’t been for you---’

‘Everyone would be better off,’ David said cutting of the man.

The man just shook his head.

‘Who are you?’ David asked. He’d never seen him before.

‘Clarence Odbody, A-S-2,’ the man held out his hand. David shook the offered hand, despite his confusion.

‘Odbody… A-S-2? What the fuck are you talking about?’ David asked, pulling his hand away.

‘Angel, second class,’ he replied proudly.

Great, David thought, turning back to his drink, he’s found the craziest person in the room.

‘Well Clarence, you don’t know anything about me,’ David snapped at him, ‘everyone would be better off if I wasn’t around.’

‘I know plenty about you David,’ Clarence said.

‘How do you know my name anyway?’ David asked, bristling angrily.

‘I told you. I’m an angel. We know these things,’ Clarence replied.

He turned back to his drink, finishing it in one gulp.

‘I can make that happen you know,’ Clarence said.

‘What? Make what happened?’ David asked, wishing so much that this guy, this  _ angel _ would leave him alone.

‘I can show you what it would be like if you were never born,’ Clarence suggested.

‘Sure. Whatever,’ David said, rolling his eyes, hoping that he would be left alone.

‘Great,’ Clarence stood, stepping uncomfortably close to David. David looked at him. He opened his mouth, ready to tell Clarence he needed to leave him alone.

Instead Clarence reached over and lightly pushed David’s shoulder.

What the fu--,’ before David could finish he was falling. The wobbly stool underneath him tipped. David was falling backwards, towards the disgusting floor. His arms flailed in front of him as he attempted to grab hold of something. Instead he grabbed only air.

With a thud he hit the ground. Hard. For a second the world went black. When David opened his eyes, Clarence was standing over him.

‘What the fuck,’ David scrambled to his feet, turning to see if his clothes were stained by the sticky floor.

‘It’s done. You were never born,’ Clarence smiled proudly.

‘If I wasn’t born then who am I?’ David asked.

‘You’re nobody. You’ve been given a gift David. A chance to see what the world would be like without you,’ he replied.

‘I’m leaving,’ David turned and walked out. Leaving Clarence standing in the middle of the room a smile still on his face. Dealing with his disappointed family had to be better than dealing with this crazy person.

In the parking lot David glanced around looking for his car. He was sure he had parked it right out the front.

‘What are you looking for David?’ Clarence asked, appearing beside him.

‘My car,’ David said, scanning the parking lot, ‘My cars gone.’

‘You never had a car David,’ Clarence said, ‘you weren’t born to get a car.’

David turned and looked at the man, fear beginning to ripple under his skin.

‘Fine, I’ll call a cab. I’ll report it stolen in the morning,’ all David wanted to do was go home, throw himself into Patrick’s arms and forget about anything else.

He reached into his pocket. No phone.

‘You don’t have a phone,’ Clarence said, ‘You---,’

‘I was never born. Yeah I remember,’ David snapped, wondering what had been slipped into his drink. He’d had plenty of bad trips in his time, but this was by far the weirdest.

It took him an hour to walk from the Wobbly Elm back to Schitt’s Creek. At least, David thought, that Clarence guy hadn’t followed him.

‘Angel Second Class,’ David shook his head as he climbed the steps to he and Patrick’s home. A small three bedroom cottage on the edge of town, he and Patrick had called home for a year. He hoped that by now Patrick would have sent everyone home, and would allow David to skulk inside unseen. David couldn’t deal with facing everyone else in that moment. David saw the lights were off, so he hoped one thing was working in his favour.

‘Fuck,’ David cursed, realising that his keys were gone. Whatever had happened to him, he had lost everything.

He knocked on the door. It was late, Patrick would surely be in bed, but he had no other choice.

‘Patrick!’ David called after a minute, ‘I lost my keys. Let me in.’

When Patrick didn’t answer after a few minutes of David banging on the door, David started to worry.

He stood on the doorstep, leaning his head against the cool timber. The long walk home had sobered him up. Now he stood cold and alone on his front steps.

‘Patrick. Please,’ he muttered, glancing at his feet.

‘That’s…’ David said staring at his feet. Their doormat was missing. The mat that David had picked out, that had been made by one of their vendors especially for them was gone.

Walking over to the front window David peered in. It was dark, but the light from the moon was just enough to illuminate the empty room.

For a second David feared that Patrick had packed up everything and fled into the night.

But David knew even if Patrick had started packing the second he had walked out, he wouldn’t have been able to empty the house in the few hours that David was gone.

Patrick’s piano alone would take a team to move.

‘He’s not in there,’ a voice came from behind David.

David spun in terror. There stood the man, Clarence, smiling calmly.

‘What? Where is he?’ David asked, the fear that had been rippling under the surface, bubbled up into his throat.

‘He’s not there. He’s gone. You two never met. Never married. Never bought this house,’ Clarence waved his arm around.

‘We did get married,’ David shouted, ‘see.’ He held up his left hand, ready to show Clarence his four gold rings. His fingers were bare. He looked at his other hand. No gold. No silver. No rings. Nothing.

‘See,’ Clarence continued, ‘you weren’t there for Patrick to propose to you.’

‘Stop,’ David said, pushing himself against the door, trying to get as far away from Clarence as possible, ‘stop talking.’

‘I’m just giving you what you wanted David,’ Clarence said.

‘I didn’t want this,’ David snapped, his voice breaking, ‘I didn’t want him to be gone.’

‘You weren’t here to make him stay,’ Clarence shrugged his shoulders.

‘I don’t believe that,’ David said, a sob escaping him.

‘It’s true. You changed his life David,’ Clarence replied.

David covered his eyes, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. Trying to think of what to do.

‘The motel,’ he said suddenly. If his family weren’t there, they likely returned to the motel. Brushing by Clarence, David ran down the steps and into the street.

‘They won’t be there,’ Clarence called after him. David didn’t stop, he only ran faster.

The house was normally a ten minute walk from the centre of town. David did it in half the time.

As he neared the centre of town his steps slowed. His breath was taken from him again.

As he walked the final steps towards the store, his legs started to shake.

Rose Apothecary was gone.

In its place the windows were boarded, graffiti sprayed across the old brick. Worn ‘For Lease’ signs peeled away from the timber.

‘My store,’ David said, touching the aged wood that covered the beautiful windows. He leaned against the wall, grief washing over him at what he had lost. He and Patrick had worked so hard to make the store what it was, to build something truly special in that town.

‘Are you ok?’ a voice asked. David spun around. Jocelyn stood looking at him.

‘Oh my god Jocelyn. What’s going on?’ David stepped forward never so pleased to see a member of the Schitt family in his life.

‘Sorry? Do I know you?’ she asked, looking at him confused.

‘It’s me… it’s David. I run Rose Apothecary with Patrick. Don’t you remember?’ he said.

‘I don’t know what that is sorry,’ Jocelyn said.

‘This guy bothering you Joc?’ Roland crossed the street.

‘I think he’s a bit confused,’ Jocelyn said.

‘You ok buddy?’ Roland asked.

‘Roland. You know me. My dad. We own the town,’ David said, hoping that Roland would respond.

‘Listen buddy, this towns been up for sale for forty years,’ Roland said, dropping his arm around Joselyn’s shoulder.

‘My dad bought it. Johnny Rose bought it. For me,’ David said.

Clarence’s words rattled through his mind.  _ You were never born _ . Johnny bought the town as a gift for David. If David hadn’t been there, they never would have bought the town. And when they lost everything, they would have had nowhere to go.

‘Did you say Johnny Rose?’ Joselyn asked, pulling David from his thoughts.

‘You know him?’ David asked hopefully.

‘I read about him,’ Joselyn corrected, ‘so sad. They lost all their money a few years ago. Left with absolutely nothing.’

‘Do you… do you know where they are?’ David asked, desperate for any information.

‘Toronto I think. But that was years ago. They just disappeared,’ Joselyn replied.

‘Thank you,’ David turned and with one final glance at the closed store headed towards the motel.

The motel was worn, weathered. ‘Rosebud’ was missing from the sign. Not pulled down, it looked like it was never there to begin with. As David walked across the parking lot, he saw a ‘For Sale’ sign nestled between the thick weeds.

He couldn’t understand why Stevie would try and sell the motel. Then he remembered. It was only his father’s intervention that stopped her putting it on the market in the first place.

The only car in the parking lot was Stevie’s parked down the far end.

As he pushed the door open and stepped into the lobby, the lights flickered. The room was half in darkness.

‘Stevie?’ David called softly into the room.

‘Can I help you?’ she said. Until she spoke, David hadn’t even noticed her sitting behind the desk. She looked smaller than she normally did. Sadder. Somehow the room looked even sadder and more rundown than David ever remembered.

‘It’s me,’ David said, standing opposite her, across the reception desk.

‘Ok,’ she replied slowly, clearly not recognising him in the slightest.  _ Fuck _ .

‘This is going too far. Where’s my parents? Where’s Patrick?’ David asked.

‘I have no idea what you’re talking about,’ she said, her eyes drifting back towards the broken screen of the computer, almost as if by habit.

David suspected he wouldn’t get a reaction from Stevie but knew he had to try. He started talking. Telling her about them moving to Schitt’s Creek, living in the motel. His father going into business with her. Everything.

‘You’re my best friend Stevie. Please. This is freaking me the fuck out,’ David begged.

‘I think you should get the hell away from my motel,’ Stevie said, her voice cold.

‘Please,’ David moved around the reception desk and reached for her. She was faster. Her fist flew towards David’s face, connecting with his mouth.

‘Ow! Fuck,’ David said as he toppled down.

‘Get the fuck out,’ she said standing over him, her fists still clenched. She wasn’t his friend. Not this Stevie. This Stevie was alone, sad and defensive. Not unlike the Stevie he met when they first arrived in town.

David touched his lip, pulling his fingers away to see blood.

He stood slowly, trying to get his bearings. His mind raced. He needed more information. He needed to know where his family were.

As he wiped his fingers across his split lip again he noticed that Stevie’s phone and keys sat on the reception desk, her bag on the shelf underneath.

Stevie was fast but David was desperate.

Before she could register what he was doing, David grabbed her bag, phone and keys and was halfway to the door.

‘What the fuck?’ she shouted, following him out the door.

By the time David slammed the car door shut behind him, locking it behind him, Stevie was banging on the window shouting.

‘I’m sorry Stevie. I’ll bring it back,’ he yelled over her. He didn’t know what else to do. He needed to see if he could find his family and had no idea where else to start.

He pulled out of the parking lot, Stevie shouting after him angrily.

David was half way down the road when he noticed the lights on at Ray’s. He pulled the car over, fairly sure that Stevie would have given up chasing him, and jumped out. He had to know.

David knocked on the door, shifting from foot to foot as he waited.

A minute later Ray opened the door.

‘Good evening,’ Ray said smiling, ‘can I help you?’

‘Patrick? Where’s Patrick?’ he said pushing his way into the room. Ray barely flinched, walking happily after David.

‘Patrick? You mean Patrick Brewer?’ Ray asked.

‘Yes!’ David shouted, relief that for the first time that night someone knew who he was talking about.

‘Patrick hasn’t worked here in years. He only stayed a few months. Lovely man though. Sad… but lovely,’ Ray said.

‘What do you mean he only stayed a few months?’ David asked. He looked at the desk where he had first met Patrick. It didn’t look all that different.

‘His fiance came and took him home I think. That was a long time ago. Can I help you with something perhaps? Photo series? Closet reorganisation? Travel plans?’ Ray asked hopefully.

David felt like he was going to be sick. The thought of Patrick going back to Rachel shook him to his core.

David thought about what Patrick had told him when she had come to town. When the barbecue for their four month anniversary had been interrupted.

_ You make me feel right _ . They’d talked afterwards about their pasts. Patrick telling him how lost and alone he had felt. How wrong he had felt for most of his life. If Patrick had gone back to Rachel, continued to live a life that he wasn’t meant to, that meant that he was still unhappy and alone.

Suddenly the room felt suffocating. He turned and quickly walked towards the door. Ray still asking about what service he was looking for.

David climbed back into Stevie’s car and drove out of town. There wasn’t anything there for him now. And while David was starting to believe that Clarence really had erased him from existence, David had to see for himself.

***

After some searching on Stevie’s stolen phone David found an address for his father. Putting the car into gear, David drove. Hours of road stretching before him. He drove through the night, his mind racing at the possibilities of what was happening and how best to get back to the life he had, he traced the cut on his lip with his tongue and glanced down at his bare fingers, each time he thought that maybe he was dreaming.

David needed to find his parents, his sister, his husband. He needed to see if they knew him. Yes, Stevie hadn’t recognised him. He hadn’t even seen a glimmer of recognition in her eyes. But if anyone could hold it together while David freaked out in front of them, it was Stevie. He knew the rest of his family couldn’t lie.

If his existence truly had been erased then he needed to see for himself what the impact was. To know for sure that he was really gone.

David pulled up at the apartment block at 8am. He had been driving for hours. He was completely drained, physically and emotionally, but he couldn’t bring himself to rest.

The building was old, worn and covered in graffiti. Two windows were smashed on the ground floor.

David walked up the steps, avoiding the garbage on the ground. Scanning the apartment numbers he saw the name ‘J. Rose’ beside apartment 12D.

With a heavy breath he rang the buzzer. He waited then rang it again. And again.

‘They don’t work,’ a woman said as she walked from the building. David froze for a moment, then as she turned and walked away, he grabbed the door.

He’d come this far. He had to know.

Walking up the stairs towards his father’s apartment, David couldn’t quite believe that Johnny would end up somewhere worse that the motel in Schitt’s Creek.

Reaching the door David paused. Everything that happened over the past hours washing over him again.

With a clenched fist and a deep breath he knocked.  _ Please _ , he thought.

He heard movement inside. Then the door was opening.

Johnny Rose, his father stood before him.

‘Can I help you?’ Johnny asked, looking at David without a single moment of recognition. Johnny wore his usual suit, but instead of the crisp lines of the fabric David was used to seeing, the suit looked worn and tattered. Johnny’s sleeves were rolled up carelessly, a poorly repaired tear in his pants ran across his left thigh. This was not the man David had known all his life. Not the man who helped them thrive in Schitt’s Creek.

‘Do you… do you know who I am?’ David asked, already sensing the answer.

Johnny looked at him, studied his face, as though he was really trying to decide whether he knew David or not.

Shaking his head Johnny spoke, ‘sorry I don’t know you. Did you use to work at Rose Video?’

‘No... I’m your son,’ David said stepping forward, feeling desperate.

‘I don’t have a son. I’m nobody’s father,’ Johnny said, his voice heavy.

‘Seriously?’ David stepped forward, ‘look at me. You're my father.’ David waved his hand across his face. No one that ever saw Johnny and David together could deny that they were father and son, and yet Johnny stood there looking at David not seeing the obvious resemblance at all.

‘I don’t know you,’ Johnny replied stepping away from David.

‘Where’s Mom? She’ll remember me,’ David said, desperation rising within him.

‘Mom?’ Johnny furrowed his brows, ‘if you mean my wife… she isn’t… she isn’t here.’

‘Where is she? She’ll know me,’ David said reaching and gripping his father’s arm desperately.

‘Moira is… she’s at Willowbank Rehabilitation,’ Johnny said, defeat clear in his voice.

Rehabilitation? Moira had always had a complicated relationship with pills and alcohol, but David couldn’t believe she would agree to rehab. Even in her darkest times, she hadn’t gone. Johnny had always helped her through.

‘What? Why?’ David asked.

‘Look I don’t know who you are,’ Johnny said, ‘I really don’t need to tell you anything. I’ve already said too much.’

‘Please,’ David begged. He needed to know.

‘You need to go. I’ll call the police if you don’t,’ Johnny said, squaring his shoulders.

‘I just need to know,’ David said desperately.

Johnny walked back into his apartment and picked up his phone. David held up his hands. The police were the last thing he needed.

Something dawned on him, something Johnny had said.

‘Wait,’ David said, ‘what did you mean… what did you mean when you said you were nobody’s father?’

Johnny clenched his jaw, ‘my daughter. Alexis. She’s… please just go.’

David’s heart sank heavy in his chest. Johnny lowered his head, grief written across his features, shutting the door, leaving David standing alone in the hall.

_ Alexis _ , a shiver ran through David. He moved quickly back to the car.

Outside, he pulled Stevie’s phone from his pocket, ignoring the five missed calls from the motel.

He searched his sister’s name with a heavy heart.

_ Socialite Alexis Rose Dead _ .

The headline slammed into David with the weight of a freight train.

With a shaking finger he clicked the link.

‘She didn’t. No. She’s alive,’ David muttered as he read the article. It claimed that Alexis,  _ the only child of Johnny and Moira Rose _ , was killed while holidaying in Saudi Arabia.

The article was eight years old.

David remembered that trip. He had sent her coloured contact lenses and a dark wig. She came home.

‘I don’t believe it,’ David said.

‘Believe it,’ a voice came from behind him. David spun around to see Clarence standing there.

‘I saved her,’ David said, a sob shaking his body, ‘she got out.’

‘You weren’t there to save her. No one was there to save her. She died,’ Clarence said.

David dropped the phone, letting it clatter to his feet as he fell to his knees.

‘Each man’s life touches so many other lives,’ Clarence said, ‘when he isn’t around he leaves an awful hole doesn’t he?’

‘This isn’t what I wanted,’ David cried, tears rolling freely down his face.

‘You see David, you really had a wonderful life. Don’t you see what a mistake it would be to throw it away?’ Clarence said.

David sobbed, his head in his hands, crying until his tears dried. Grieving for a sister he wasn’t there to save. For the life that she wouldn’t lead. For the future she wouldn’t have.

Johnny hadn’t remembered him. Hadn’t known him. And David was sure it would be the same with his mother, but he needed to see her. Needed to see her life with his own eyes.

Pulling himself to his feet, he picked up the phone and looked up Willowbank Rehabilitation. It was an hour away. He had to try.

Looking around David realised that Clarence was gone again. He wiped a hand over his face and climbed into the car.

***

Willowbank Rehabilitation was not exactly what he had expected. An old brown brick building with small windows covered with steel bars, sat surrounded by a large fence and cracked concrete.

David exited the car and entered through a small front door, glass cracked and yellowed with age.

‘I’m here to see Moira Rose,’ David said at the check-in desk.

‘And you are?’ the nurse asked, looking up from her paperwork.

‘Her son,’ he answered, before realising that in this world, the world he didn’t exist in, that was an entirely wrong response.

‘Excuse me?’ she said.

‘From tv. Her tv son,’ David said in a rush, hoping the woman sitting at the desk wasn’t a Sunrise Bay fan.

‘Oh right. Of course. If you could just fill this out I’ll take you through,’ she slid a sign-in book across the counter.

Taking the pen David wrote his name, well part of his name in the form.  _ David Brewer _ . He knew he had to drop the Rose. He needed to see Moira and couldn’t risk the nurse asking more questions.

‘Right this way Mr Brewer,’ the nurse said. Hearing himself called that physically pained him. His bare fingers suddenly felt heavy.

He followed the nurse down the hall, looking at the patients sitting quietly in their rooms, or shuffling down the hall. It was a sad place.

Moira sat in a small room. Wigs lined the window seal.

‘Mom?’ David said. Moira turned towards the noise, her eyes glazed. David’s heart sank. Again.

He suspected that if Moira knew him in this life, she would have forgotten him long ago.

‘Mrs Blake thank you,’ she said, holding out her hand. She was frail, looking smaller than David had ever seen her.

Once the nurse left them David sat opposite his mother, watching as she turned her attention back to the wig she was brushing in front of her.

‘Do you know me?’ he asked softly.

‘Of course,’ she replied without looking up. David’s heart rate increased, hope rushing through him, ‘you’re Stefan’s body double. From season 12.’

His heart sank again. This wasn’t his mother. He was talking to another stranger.

‘About Alexis,’ David started. Moira’s eyes snapped up and stared at him. Her eyes clear for just a moment.

‘What about it?’ her voice had shifted, anger rising up.

‘I’m sorry I wasn’t there for her,’ David said simply. Moira looked at him, sadness filling her eyes.

‘We all make mistakes dear,’ Moira replied, before turning back to her wig and talking more about Sunrise Bay as though she had really lived that life.

After an hour David left. He couldn’t sit and watch the shell of his mother like that any more.

The nurse was sitting at the desk when he walked out.

‘Thank you. Is she… is she always like that?’ David asked.

‘After her daughter died. And losing the money,’ the nurse said, ‘it just became too much. Her husband… ex-husband really, still pays all her bills. No one visits her though. It’s all to painful for her.’

‘What do you mean ex-husband?’ David asked. Johnny hadn’t said anything about a divorce.

‘After her daughter died and the addictions became unmanageable, Moira filed for divorce. I really shouldn’t be telling you all this, but she thought she was holding Mr Rose back,’ the nurse said, ‘it’s all very sad.’.

The thought of his parents being divorced was unimaginable to David. Through everything that they had experienced, every high and low, Johnny and Moira’s relationship had remained strong and steady. Their love defined everything. The love they had for each other was limitless. But here, in this strange reality, they had experienced too much, lost too much and Moira had left.

It didn’t sound to David like it was because they stopped loving each other, and Johnny still taking care of Moira was proof enough of that, but that the pain of their lives was too much to stay together. The sight of each other a reminder of their lossed daughter.

Walking out of the centre David climbed into the car again.

There was only one place left that he knew he had to go. He had seen everyone else's lives torn apart and he suspected what would be waiting for him, but he had to see it. Had to see what Patrick’s life had become if they hadn’t met.

He had dealt with a lot of heartbreak that day, his best friend was wasting her life in a rotting motel, his father was barely holding his life together, his mother was in rehab brought down by grief and loss and his sister was dead and while he wasn’t sure he could handle seeing Patrick without him, he had to. Patrick was the last thread of hope to which David held onto.

Once again David put the car into gear and pulled out into the street. It would be another long drive ahead of him, and his exhaustion felt almost overwhelming him, but he couldn’t stop. Not until he knew for sure.

***

David had only been to the Brewer’s house a handful of times in the years he and Patrick had been together. Marcy and Clint generally came to see them in Schitt’s Creek instead. At first glance the house looked the same, blue shutters, neatly trimmed lawn, cars parked in the driveway.

Maybe David didn’t impact their lives like he had his parents. As he rushed up the steps he noticed the roses in the front garden were different. He remembered when they had visited last, how he had helped Marcy position them correctly.

After his day so far, poorly placed roses was the least of his worries. 

David tried not to think about Patrick’s life without him. Without Schitt’s Creek. He knew how alone Patrick had felt before he had moved to that town. All he could do, as he stood at the Brewer’s front door, was hope that Patrick was still able to figure himself out, without David being there. That someone else had been their to take Patrick’s hand and he found his truth.

David knocked with a shaking hand.

He heard people moving around inside. Hopefully Clint or Marcy would be able to tell him where Patrick was. He needed to see for himself if Patrick knew him.

The door swung open and with it David’s breath left him.

‘P...Patrick?’ David said, a sob escaping him as his husband stood in front of him. No. Not his husband. Not here.

After seeing his family, having experienced blow after blow of grief, David had thought he would be able to tolerate seeing Patrick. But he was entirely wrong. He still looked like David’s Patrick. Same blue button-down shirts, same tight jeans, same terrible mountaineering shoes. But one look and David knew it wasn’t his Patrick. Wasn’t his husband.

‘I’m sorry. Do I know you?’ Patrick replied. It would have hurt less if Patrick had punched him in the stomach. The way Patrick looked at David, like he was a stranger, burnt.

‘You have to. Please remember me Patrick,’ David rushed forward, desperate to touch him, to hold him.

Patrick stepped back, holding his arms up to keep David away. Then David saw it. Sitting on Patrick’s left ring finger. A gold band. A stark contrast to David’s now bare fingers. To the untrained eye it looked much like Patrick’s wedding ring, but not to David. This one was too thin, too worn, like it hadn’t been polished since it was put on. It wasn’t the one that David had spent hours selecting. And worst of all, David hadn’t been the one who put it there.

‘Please… please tell me you didn’t. You aren’t...’ David’s body started to shake, his knees felt weak. David gripped the doorframe, holding himself steady.

‘Babe, what’s going on?’ a voice David hadn’t heard in years came from behind Patrick. He turned as Rachel walked up behind him.  _ Babe _ . He couldn’t think of another name that suited Patrick less. Something about it was too generic and coming from Rachel felt entirely wrong.

‘Umm... this man’s just a bit lost I think,’ Patrick said, looking back at David.

Rachel came to stand beside Patrick, putting her arm around his waist. The action was too much, David’s knees gave way as he sobbed. His husband standing there, married to someone else, looking at him like a complete stranger. The last thread of hope David held onto snapped.

‘What’s happening?’ Marcy walked to the front door.

‘This guys lost I think,’ Patrick said stepping back to give his mother room.

Marcy crouched to the ground, placing her hand on David’s shaking shoulders.

David looked up into Marcy’s kind eyes. It only made him cry anew.

‘Come on,’ Marcy stood, pulling the taller man with her. Clint quickly joined her, taking David’s other arm and leading him inside.

Marcy bought David inside. Because no matter what reality Marcy was in, she was a gracious host and never let anyone go uncared for. David sat on their couch, shaking, staring at Patrick desperately.

Patrick sat opposite David, watching him carefully, nervously. Rachel perched on the armrest of the couch beside him.

Rachel ran her hand across Patrick’s shoulders, kissing him on the cheek. David watched as Patrick turned and smiled at her. But David knew Patrick’s smiles, each and every one of them catalogued in David’s mind in intimate detail. Over the years they had been together David had learned each and every one, the way his lips moved and eyes lit up. And the smile he gave to Rachel was tight, fake and didn’t even for a moment reach his eyes.

Marcy bought David a glass of water and a wet cloth to hold against his split lip, helping him to catch his breath long enough to think more clearly.

Looking around the room David’s eyes fell to the mantle. In the centre sat a photo of Patrick and Rachel’s wedding. She looked beautiful in a long white dress, her hair curled softly around her shoulders. Patrick had his hands around her waist. He wore a charcoal suit. He looked so handsome. But David couldn’t help but look at his face. His smile was tight, looking forced.

David thought about the wedding photo that had sat on Marcy and Clint’s mantle before. The wedding photo of he and Patrick.

They had been standing together in the middle of the dance floor. David’s hands gripped Patrick’s shoulders. He couldn’t remember what they were talking about but David had been laughing and a broad smile spread across Patrick’s face as he stared at David. They both had been radiating happiness that day. He loved that picture. And now it was gone. Like so much of his life.

Looking at the family before him, the people that had once been his own family, David studied them, fighting the panic attack that was overwhelming him.

He saw the tension in Clint and Marcy too, and while some of that was likely caused by David, the stranger sitting on their couch having trouble breathing, the way they looked between Patrick and Rachel, like any sudden movements would cause an explosion told David all he needed. None of them were happy. The happy smiling in-laws he had known were gone. His happy husband that was always ready to joke and tease him, but loved him more than anything was gone too.

‘You have to remember me Patrick,’ David said, in a final attempt to see some recognition in his husband’s eyes.

‘I’m sorry, I don’t know you,’ Patrick said.

‘You married me. I’m your husband. Please,’ David begged.

‘What?’ Rachel laughed, ‘Patrick’s straight. We’re married. You have him confused with someone else.’ Clint stood and walked from the room, David barely noticed as he stared intently at Patrick.

Patrick’s hands clenched into fists on his lap. David wondered if this Patrick had worked out that he was gay, or whether he was still in the dark about his own truth.

‘We met in Schitt’s Creek. We have a store together. A house, We’re happy,’ David pressed on, knowing deep down that it was pointless. He still had to try. He felt desperate and afraid.

‘Schitt’s Creek?’ Patrick said. David nodded, ‘I worked there for a few months. But I never met you. I’m sorry. I’d remember.’

‘That sad little town?’ Rachel asked.

‘It wasn’t sad. You were happy there. We were happy there,’ David said, fighting as his tears threatened to fall again.

Clint came back into the room, a phone held in his hand, ‘they’ll be here shortly,’ he said, attempting to speak quietly. David still heard.

‘Who? Who will be here?’ David stood defensively.

‘David dear,’ Marcy stepped closer, trying to calm him, ‘we just want to get you some help. Please sit.’

David retreated to the corner of the room, like a wounded animal. Patrick stood but remained on the other side of the room, like he was wary of David’s movements.

‘I need to go. Please,’ David said moving towards the door. He couldn’t stay there anymore. They weren’t his family. That wasn’t his husband. Not anymore.

He heard them call after him as he ran down the stairs and back to the car. As he pulled away, he saw Patrick, his parents and Rachel standing on the front porch watching him drive away, his body shaking as tears blurred his vision.

He had nowhere else to go, no one else to see if they remembered him. He hadn’t seen Clarence for a long time. So he decided he would drive to the one place he had been truly happy in his life.

***

David drove back to Schitt’s Creek. He didn’t know where else to go. He could only hope he would be able to find Clarence again. Maybe he could change things back. Could ease David’s pain.

As he drove back into the town, past the town sign, David started to sob again. He was lost. Everything that he had gained over the last few years had been taken away.

His bond with Stevie, his ever strengthening relationship with his family and his love for Patrick. Vanished.

As another sob wracked David’s body, the car lunged and shuddered. Looking down David saw the fuel light was on.

‘Fuck,’ David groaned as the car shook to a halt. David dropped his head to the wheel and cried.

Looking up eventually, David realised that he had run out of gas right across the road from the Wobbly Elm. Right where his nightmare had begun.

David stepped from the car.

‘Clarence,’ he shouted as he crossed the street. This had all started when David had met Clarence. David could only hope that the angel had some way of undoing what he had done. Of giving his family their lives back.

David turned in the middle of the parking lot, shouting for Clarence, begging him to come back. Grief and loss washed over David, overwhelming him.

‘Please,’ David cried, ‘please I want to go back. Help me Clarence. I want to live again. Please.’

His whole body shook as he crumbled to his knees, gravel biting into his skin.

‘Please,’ he begged over and over, his hands gripping his hair tightly, ‘please.’

‘David, what are you doing?’

David opened his eyes, lifting his head he saw Stevie walking towards him.

‘Your cars right there. Just take it,’ David said through his tears, ‘I’m sorry.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Stevie crouched in front of David, ‘David what’s going on?’

She reached out touching his shoulder gently.

David’s head snapped up again and looked at her. Really looked. She looked at him like she really knew him, a concerned expression on her face.

‘Stevie?’ he asked. 

‘Who else would it be. We’ve been looking for you for hours,’ she helped him stand on shaky legs.

‘You have?’ David couldn’t believe she was there.

‘Of course. Patrick’s beside himself. Your Dad’s planning some search party,’ Stevie replied.

‘Is everyone ok?’ David asked, still confused.

‘Other than freaking out about you running off, yeah. Come on, let’s get you home before Patrick calls the national guard or something,’ Stevie replied.

David’s legs were too weak to hold himself up properly so Stevie helped him into her car. As she called Patrick, to tell him that she had found David, David traced his tongue across his lips. The split she had put there with her fist was gone. He looked down at his hand. The four gold rings Patrick had placed there had returned, sparkling in the low light.

‘They’re meeting us at your place. We’ll pick Patrick’s car up in the morning,’ Stevie said as she climbed into the driver's seat, ‘can I trust you won’t try and run away again?’

David stared at her like she wasn’t real, like she would disappear at any moment. But he offered her a small nod before she started the car and started the drive home.

***

As they pulled up outside his home, David stepped from the car, both desperately wanting to see everyone and terrified it would be taken from him again.

The front door flew open before he had even shut his car door. Patrick was running towards him.

‘David, thank god,’ he said, wrapping his arms tightly around his husband.

‘Patrick?’ David sobbed into Patrick’s sweater, ‘you know me?’

Patrick pulled back, holding David’s face in his hands, ‘of course I know you. David are you ok?’

‘Who am I?’ David asked, not trusting Patrick’s reaction to him.

‘What?’ Patrick looked confused, ‘David, you’re my husband. Do you… do you not remember?’

David let out a sob, pulling Patrick close to him, ‘I never forgot,’ he laughed through his tears. Relief washing over him as he felt Patrick kiss his neck, holding him tightly.

‘I love you David. Please don’t run off again,’ Patrick said, his eyes filled with worry.

‘I’m not going anywhere,’ David promised. He knew where he needed to be, where he belonged.

‘I’m sorry I left,’ he said. Patrick was already shaking his head.

‘I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t talk to me. I spoke with the auditors, they think what we’ve submitted is going to be fine. We’re going to be fine David,’ Patrick explained.

‘I just thought because I made those mistakes you’d be better off without me,’ David said looking at his feet.

‘David,’ Patrick said sternly, causing David to lift his gaze, ‘We are more than the store. I’m not going anywhere. I couldn’t imagine my life without you.’

David pulled back enough to look into Patrick’s eyes. In them he saw love and concern and a promise of forever. David didn’t need to imagine what Patrick’s life without David would be like. He had seen it and hated every second of it.

‘Come inside,’ Patrick said, kissing David’s hand.

David gripped Patrick’s hand, looking down at his wedding ring. The gold band that he had put there was back. Back where it belonged shining in the low light.

The front door of the house swung open again. Johnny and Moira walked out and headed directly towards their son.

David thought of the last time they had seen them, alone, separated and lost.

‘Son. We’re glad you’re back,’ Johnny said touching David’s shoulder. David looked at his parents, taking in their happiness, Johnny’s arm across Moira’s back.

‘You had us positively bedevilled with worry David,’ Moira added.

‘Sorry. It won’t happen again,’ he said with a smile.

‘See that it doesn’t,’ Moira said squeezing her son’s arm.

Relief that his family had been returned to him washed over David. There was just one more person he needed to see. Needed to make sure was safe.

Alexis stepped outside. David rushed towards her, pulling his sister into a hug.

‘What are you doing?’ she asked, shocked.

‘I’m just glad you’re ok,’ he muttered.

‘Oh my god David. You’re the one that ran off,’ she replied, but hugged him back nonetheless.

David finally let go of his sister.

‘Let’s go inside,’ Patrick said, placing a hand on David’s lower back and guiding him inside.

David nodded and with each step began to accept that he was back in the right place. Back where he should be. Where he belonged.

When they walked into the front room people slowly made their way over to David, squeezing his arm or patting his back, murmuring that they were pleased he was safe.

Stevie handed David a glass of wine as people began to celebrate properly around them.

‘Thank you Clarence,’ David whispered. He understood the gift he had been given and promised himself he wouldn’t take it for granted.

‘What’s that?’ Patrick asked, his hand running up and down David’s back.

‘Nothings,’ David smiled.

‘Perhaps a song?’ Moira said. The Jazzagals moved so they stood in a rough line. The first bars of Auld Lang Syne filled the room.

Patrick stood behind David, arms wrapped tightly around David’s waist, kissing him on the shoulder.

As David looked around the room at his family and friends, happiness radiating from each of them, he knew that he was exactly where he belonged. They all were, in the wonderful life they had built. Together.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you again!  
> Comments and Kudos always appreciated!


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